No matter the path you take to reach your goals, there are always lessons to be learned—whether it’s regarding the endeavor itself, or just life in general. Our contributor, Jenna Wohlwend, spent three years in LA in her early 20s auditioning in order to find success as an actress. She came out of the experience with a lot of lessons learned and self-discoveries. Read on to hear more about her story and the positives that taking a risk and just “going for it” can add to your life.
Once upon a time, a young girl saw her first play, “Beauty and the Beast,” and fell in love with the magic of musical theater. She was already well into dance classes and piano lessons—and LOVED to sing, so she started focusing on all these passions, watching musicals and auditioning for local theater shows. She went to college, got a theatrical agent, graduated early to move to LA and continued a quest to make a living doing what she loved—performing.
What’s the ending you ask? Did her dream come true? Did she live happily ever after? Well, since that girl is me, I can answer these questions, but before I do, the important part, as they say, is the journey, not the destination. So, let me first share the things I learned while trying to pursue my dreams when auditioning in LA in my early 20s.
Feeling Like a Real Adult is Tough
LA is a unique place. It is filled with so many creatives and dreamers. There was a sense of not quite being sure what era of my life I was in. Was I an adult? In some ways, yes. Was I a kid? Also, yes. But balancing trying to make money and be responsible and support yourself with also needing the freedom to just drop everything on a whim for an audition was something that made me feel very flakey—one thing I would have never formerly used to describe myself. There was a struggle to commit to any one thing because I always felt like I was letting someone down. Luckily, I found a job that let me do what I needed to do. I really wanted the stability of an adult, but unfortunately, it was just hard to balance. Something always had to give, and feeling like a bona fide grownup 100 percent of the time was one of them.
Keeping an Open Mind is Key
When it comes to dreams, no matter what they are, we have a specific idea in our heads of how things should go and what will help get us to our goals. I learned this during my time in LA, but it has applied in my life throughout—let go of that expectation and keep an open mind. Don’t turn down any opportunity based on previous judgments or misconceptions because you never know where it could lead or what additional passion it could spark. Be open to trying new things. I was open to doing comedy, dramatic, improv, etc., and looking at my potential from different angles helped me expand where I think I fit best in the industry.
Rejection is Constant
It isn’t a lie what they say. The rejection is a consistent factor. It’s what you sign up for. You definitely hear the word “no” more than “yes.” I sure did. The good part? You grow a thick skin. However, when I look back, I try to remember that the yeses aren’t always the successes. I had some awesome opportunities auditioning on some of the biggest movie lots in the world. Just to get that far is pretty great, too.
Auditioning is One of the Best Skills to Have in Life
Auditioning taught me to not focus or care so much about what other people think, it sharpened my improvisation skills and it made me comfortable in being nervous. I fortunately never had an inappropriate situation (aka a “casting couch” situation), but the skills that I learned from this part of my life translated very well into interviewing for my career, presenting at work and just all-around meeting new people and starting new things. I don’t feel as stupid if I fumble on something or forget something because I am used to the idea of performing and presenting just for the sake of being judged (aka auditioning) and found my stride in that.
Learn to Be Proud of What You are Trying to Do
I would CRINGE when anyone asked me what I did for a living. The honest answer at the time was that I had a journalism degree and graduated early to try to be an actress. I was working at desk jobs to pay the bills, and while a lot of my peers were really starting regular, reliable careers, I was experimenting with something that I wanted to become one—with no guarantee that it ever could. In short, I felt like a cliché. I hated the “starving actress” thing and as someone who always took school seriously and liked to succeed, it was difficult for me to admit what I was doing. But honestly, I’m proud now—and I should have been proud then. Not many people even bother trying those seemingly “out-of-reach” goals, and someone has to succeed at them, so my nerve to even eliminate the notion of wondering “what if” should have been something I wore proud.
Don’t Care What Other People Think
I know without a doubt that this endeavor of mine struck doubt and judgment in many people who heard it. It’s “lofty, wasteful, pointless” blah, blah, blah. Or worse, that people think that I thought of myself a certain way to think that this was even possible. I know these thoughts and doubts came from people who I was close to even—friends. You get an instant feel of who is genuinely supportive or understanding and of who isn’t and you learn to simply NOT CARE. Of course, you’re human and things might still get to you, but not at least trying to reach a goal or go for a passion because you are worried about what someone else might think is simply absurd. That’s the real waste.
Conflicting Opinions Run Rampant, So Follow Your Gut
I would go to classes, showcases, workshops and auditions and be told one of two things: 1. “This headshot is perfect! I love it!” Or B. “This headshot looks nothing like you. Get a new one immediately.” So…huh? One of the first things I noticed when I got to LA was this sense of conflict. I could never get a straight answer. Everything is subjective and I just felt like it was hard to learn anything or get better because one person would say one thing and then another person would say something completely different. I ended up giving up on being the monkey in the middle and forfeited this weird tug-of-war. I decided to follow my gut and make choices that I felt were right in monologues and picked out pictures of myself and seemed to be how I felt on the inside, or what I saw in the mirror. I also learned how to tune people out and just smile and take the criticism without feeling totally exhausted and defeated. (Though that was a struggle each time.)
Acting Classes are INTENSE
Acting classes oftentimes follow the same “follow your gut” rule. It’s subjective. It’s art. You have to do what feels right. And there are many crazy tactics to pull emotions out. You’ve likely heard of method acting—where you essentially let go of yourself and do everything you can to embody a character. Well, I’ve done plenty of acting classes and seen this method firsthand (it wasn’t my preferred route). The nitty gritty details and uncomfortable content that teachers ask and push out of their students in these classes is not for the faint of heart. Also, you can learn A LOT from these classes, and acting is a muscle that should always be toned, but they can be some of the most awkward, intense settings ever.
It’s Important to Keep a Positive Community Around You
I was lucky enough to find some great friends while I lived there who were down-to-earth and supportive. That industry can breed some shallow, competitive atmosphere and as previously mentioned, I had some wonderful people and a wonderful family that understood what I was trying to do and didn’t judge me for it. There are a certain few who know just who they are and I am very thankful every day that I had people in my life like that then. (And still do!)
Trying Can Be Almost as Good as Succeeding
I will never have to wonder “what if” and that’s something that I can take with me through the course of my life and feel at peace with. I don’t have my head in the clouds on this dream. I know what it takes and I know what I had control of and what I didn’t. As mentioned, trying can mean a lot and sometimes, I’ll admit, it didn’t always feel that way, but the truth is that it does. “Going for’ something should always be applauded.
Dying to know the end of the story? Well after a few years of trying, new dreams started to form. I wanted to travel, I wanted to build a dependable career and I wanted to move closer to my family. I was trying, but I don’t think I wanted to sacrifice all the other things I wanted and loved for the one dream. So, I made the difficult decision and let go of this “all in, nothing else” lifestyle of trying to pursue acting.
I spent some time in Europe, moved back to San Francisco, started a career in marketing and built a blog that has allowed me a lot of opportunity in another dream—writing.
Nothing touches me quite like performing though. Nothing. However, I still sing all the time, I am looking into auditioning for theater again and I just signed up for guitar lessons! So, happily, I’m still making all the things I love priorities.
I look back on that era and it feels like a lifetime ago, but the lessons I took from it have enriched my life since and have most definitely made me a more confident, self-assured person. But I’m still learning as I go, I don’t think it ever stops. But please remember that if you have something you love and want to try, just do it! Silence the noise around you and do what makes you happy. And again, simply trying can be a success.
Jenna Wohlwend is a content strategist at a tech company in San Francisco and runs her own lifestyle blog, Jenna Rose Colored Glasses. She has her B.A. in Broadcast Journalism and loves karaoke, reading, cooking and traveling with her husband.
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